(Written by a student in Beijing who was graduated from high school this year.)
Advice From Someone with First-Hand Experience
I went to see my uncle last night. His name is Qiang. That means “good” in Chinese. It stands for vigor and power. There’s a certain irony in having been so named, for Uncle Qiang’s life has been a bit of a disappointment for him, as he didn’t get a university education and has never been able to find suitable work. He has changed jobs frequently and has had difficulty eking out a living. Whenever I’m with him I see the hurt that he feels in his 40-year-old eyes.
He works now as a projectionist in a small theater that holds only 100 people. As his wages are low, he eats only sparingly and often goes hungry. He lives in a small bedroom attached to the theater, and I was surprised to discover that he and the other workers have to shower in a public toilet.
When I arrived at the theater, there was still a mist over the city. It had been raining for a long time and was beginning to let up. Some water puddled on the field in front of the cinema, and the overhead lamps gleamed. A breeze slipped over my shoulder, and made me shiver. There weren’t many people waiting to get in. Perhaps it was the time, the rain, or the movie itself.
The tiny cinema is between two big restaurants, and I found myself looking through the crystal glass wall of one of them. There appeared to be many wealthy ladies and gentlemen sitting at the tables.
After walking up the steps to the theater, I found myself in a small hall with a ticket counter, and I asked the cashier if Qiang was on duty. He gave me a quick once-over and then placed a phone call and returned to his work.
A few minutes later, my uncle appeared. He was dressed in a white T-shirt and gray trousers and didn’t look well. He has always been introverted, but when he saw me, he quickened his steps and gave me a weak smile. .
We sat down by a table in a corner of the hall.
“Good evening, my uncle!”
“Good evening!”
“Well, you must be surprised.”
He nodded his head in agreement. “How about your admission? Where will you go?”
“I won’t know until August”.
“The first bunch of universities has finished their selections.”
“Yes. I wasn’t admitted by my first choice. Their minimum score was 25 points higher than mine.
“Ouch!” He dropped his eyes to the table for a moment and then said, “What is your second choice?”
“Beijing University of Technology.”
“That’s not bad.” He still kept his eyes firmly on the table.
“Do you understand that it’s quite a common university? It’s just not for me. I can’t go there. It’s not possible that it’s the right place for! I shouldn’t have to go to a 2nd class university. I worked very hard for 12 years to get a good grade on the national examination. It’s terrible that I didn’t do better. Such an awful choice would destroy my life.”
My voice became louder and louder as I vented, and I was finally braying, as I lowered my head to my hands on the table and started to cry.
The movie had just ended, and as many people began leaving the hall, it became quite noisy.
“Hu Zhaoxian,” said my uncle, “you should remember that life is life, and plan is plan. They are quite different. There are always things in life that interfere with our plans.”
He spoke slowly…thoughtfully…and all of it went into my ears even though we were sitting in the middle of so much chaos. .
“Forget all your troubles”, he said. “Be yourself!”
And I heard myself respond with a “YES!”