(Written by Hu Ao in Shanghai)

          The longer I live, the more I realize the impact that failure has had on my life.

          Failures, to me, are more important than successes.  Although the latter bring pleasure, the feeling lasts only a short time while failures tend to affect my whole life, and that, I hope, will be a very long time.

          Failing to measure up doesn't make me happy or satisfied, and that's exactly the impetus I need; it makes me want to change, to make my life better.  I learn through my mistakes, analyze what went wrong, and work on improving my skills.

          Failure has taught me some of the steps I must take to become better, a more easy-going person.

          When I was in primary school, I always became arrogant when I knew the answers before the others, and my attitude made the others hate me.  Later - when I'd failed an examination and needed their help - they refused to have anything to do with me.

          I was very unhappy about being shunned and asked my grandmother why it had happened.  She told me quietly, "My boy, people may not remember exactly what you've done or what you've said, but they will always remember how you made them feel.  You are a smart boy, but you must have done some wrong things in your classes.  Think about that and do what you  should do."

          "But I don't know what I did that was wrong", I said without thinking.

          Grandma didn't respond immediately, but after a few minutes, she stood up and took a tape recorder from a bookshelf.  "Take this to class tomorrow", she said, "It will tell you what you should do."

          I knew she was very serious and nodded my head, wiping the teams from my face.

          The following day, I hid the small tape recorder in my book bag when I went to school, and it recorded everything that happened.  When the classes were over, I rushed from the classroom and at the corner of the schoolyard I pressed the key.

          It was shocking to hear some of the things I had said.  I could hardly believe that I was the boy who had said them, and I sat on the ground with my head dropping between my knees.  I hated what I'd done and knew what I should do.

          On the days that followed, I apologized to each of my classmates and began the process of changing my attitude toward others.  That wasn't easy for a 12-year-old boy.

          Failures are very valuable lessons in life.  We can't change our past.  We can't suddenly develop a talent if it's not basically there.  We have to accept that some things can't be changed.  However, we can benefit through experiencing failure if we study its causes, make the necessary changes, and then try again.